Letter From The Narcissist’s True Self

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Woman running in forest

You should run, but you won’t.

You should push me away when you realize the first red flag that goes against your values. But you won’t. You will lower your standards for me.

You should enforce your boundaries that protect you. But you won’t. You will allow me to destroy your boundaries so that you can be with me.

You should leave the first time I cheat on you. But you won’t. You will forgive me over and over again until you are so insecure you feel lucky to be with me.

You should take back your life when you start losing it because of our relationship. But you won’t. You will let go of everything you love, slowly but surely, so you can put all of your energy into me, me, and me.

You should stop trying to fix me when you observe my empty promises with no consistent change. But, you won’t. I mirrored your deepest desires from a partner at the beginning of our relationship and you fell in love with that illusion. You will hold onto that illusion so tight that you won’t let yourself admit the reality of me. You will do everything possible to try to heal me so you can live happily ever after with me.

You should realize how easy I manipulate people when all they can see is a charming and good person that you are lucky to have. But you won’t. You will start to blame yourself and feel crazy because I’ve mentally and spiritually beaten you down to the point you can’t trust your intuition.

You should listen to the people that love you and tell you to leave me. But you won’t. You will justify my bad behaviors and you will push those people further away from you, just like I want you to. The more isolated you are from support, the more control I have over you.

You should love yourself. But you won’t. You will love me and I will love feeling powerful as I control you.

Even when we are apart, and you can accept that I’m toxic, you will miss me and damn near give up all of “YOU” if I will just show you a scrap of love. I might, but it’s not true love. Nevertheless, you will accept it.

You enable my narcissism and I believe I deserve that.

The Narcissist

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